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Managing a Difficult Divorce With a Spouse

What’s more emotionally taxing that going through a divorce? Going through a divorce with a particularly difficult spouse. Marital separation is a process rife with legality, compromise, and deliberation and one that asks for quite a fair bit of mental fortitude. Throw a spouse into the mix who’s at the ready to toss in some healthy servings of personal hang ups and a dash of hostility for the hostility’s sake, and you’ve got yourself one particularly stress-inducing battle ahead of you.

Of course, stress is exactly what the opposing party wants from you. By getting you to act emotionally, they can hurt your chances of walking away with things like custody or your current property. We’re here to remind you that dealing with a difficult spouse is just par the course when it comes to divorce and that there are some helpful mindsets you can adopt that’ll make the process less of a slog for all parties involved.

Don’t Focus on Convincing Your Spouse

The goal of any argument, before it devolves into a screaming match, is to convince the other party that your opinion is in the right and more logically fortified. Do yourself a favor and shake that notion out of your head before it ends up costing you in court. If communication was a particularly weak suit in your relationship, odds are it’s not going to get any better in courtroom or at a table with lawyers present. Emotion will absolutely trounce logic in a conversation with your spouse, especially if they’re going out of their way to press your buttons. That being said, work with the healthy relationships you do have and be entirely candid and open with your divorce attorney. The more information they have on your current circumstances, the better they can help. Opting instead to take that more logical approach with a hurt spouse can just end up weakening your case.

Focus on Changing What You Can Actually Change

Building off of what we mentioned above, it’s also important to keep in mind that narrowing your focus on the problems your spouse is causing is a recipe for disaster. If you know there’s no hope in changing their mind, then the most constructive thing you can do is shift your focus inwards. Take a moment of self-reflection to come to a conclusion on the changes you can make yourself that can help your case. Start by gathering and organizing all of your legal documents and open your own solo bank/credit accounts. Compose and recollect yourself and all of your necessary legal requirements and present the best version of yourself when fighting for your rights.

Maintain Good Connection

This may seem contradictory to everything we mentioned earlier, but, as much as you wish it weren’t so, communication is a requirement in a divorce even if your spouse is being particularly difficult. The trick is to set up a grounds for your chat that curbs most of your impulses to fight. For example, meeting at neutral ground like a coffee shop is well advised. If you feel like any face-to-face meeting is doomed to end in a screaming match, try and set up communication over text or email. You’d also do well to keep documentation of the conversations you have with your partner as well in case something they say or do can be used in court.

Conclusion

Divorce is a trying process for both parties. Odds are one or both spouses feel hurt and it’s easy to let emotion take the reins in a case that should otherwise be treated logically. Remember to fight the urge to resort to mudslinging and name calling, these only make your case seem less logically sound and, should you have a child in the middle of it all, could end up hurting relationships that matter to you.

The 5 Types of Restraining Orders in California

Everyone should be afforded the most basic right of safety in their day to day routine. Unfortunately, strenuous relationships with personal or professional acquaintances can often leave many feeling like that very safety is in jeopardy. In the face of that uncertainty, restraining orders help protect you and your loved ones from those you feel to be a threat.

Of course, when it comes to securing a restraining order, knowing which ones are made available to you can help you better protect what matters most. Read on for a brief rundown of the different restraining orders California has to offer and find an attorney with experience with those kinds of cases.

Domestic Violence Restraining Orders

Like the name implies, domestic restraining orders are reserved for victims of abuse in the home. For a relationship to be eligible for this variety of restraining order, both parties need to either be in a domestic relationship or be closely related. Some examples of these kinds of relationships include:

● Married couples
● Divorced couples
● Both current and former dating couples
● Couples with children

Contrary to popular belief, roommates aren’t eligible for a domestic restraining order.

Workplace Restraining Orders

Reserved for troublesome relationships in the workplace, employers are tasked with securing workplace restraining orders for employees they feel have their safety threatened. Whether the relationship has spurred threats, harassment, stalking, or physical violence, this restraining order is geared to address the issue.

Civil Harassment Restraining Orders

Conversely related to the domestic violence restraining order, civil harassment orders are reserved for relationships that don’t fall into the prior category. Relationships such as neighbors, friends, and family are all eligible for these sorts of restraining orders.

Dependent Abuse Restraining Orders

Abused victims over the age of 65 or those above 18 with mental or physical disabilities can be eligible for a dependent abuse restraining order if they are being physical or mentally abused. In cases like these, “abuse” can mean a variety of things including neglect, abandonment, financial abuse, or even deprivation of care from a designated caregiver.

Emergency Protective Restraining Order

In special scenarios where a victim feels like they are at immediate risk of harm or abuse, they can place a request with their local law enforcement authorities for an emergency protective restraining order. These orders a typically short and very limited in duration and must be regularly extended until a more iron-clad restraining order can be secured.

Conclusion

When it comes to your protection and safety, knowing what options are made available to you is essential. Always stay informed about the different kinds of restraining orders made available to you in California and leave both you and your loved ones’ safety in capable hands.